Breaking the Rules 71-75

Breaking the rules 71-75

71) For the last time the pie-maker isn't the wood-elf king.

There was a new bakery that specializes in pies. The baker was a young, good looking man who came from humble origins. Or so what was thought in Hiruzen's mind. He questioned the baker's good looks and wondered why he became a pie-maker. Somebody like him should be in the daimyo's court.

The wells turned in Hiruzen's young mind. Oh how they turn. After some time the dots began to make non-existent connections. He has his answer.

"He's an elf king of the woods," he proclaimed.

His two teammates just looked at him. Tobirama didn't know what the hell he was saying decided not to mention anything. Poor old Kagami who just walked by looked baffled. What was Hiruzen talking about?

"What the heck is going on in your pea-size brain?" Koharu finally asked on everyone minds.

"The pie maker must be the wood-elf king. Nobody should look that good and be a pie-maker."

Tobirama hoped that this won't bite him later on with his brother.

71a) And if he was, his kingdom won't have giant spiders.

"And his kingdom is filled with giant spiders," Hiruzen continue.

"What if the spiders could talk?" Kagami thought out loud.

"Giant talking spiders," Hiruzen began to panic. "We need to talk with the pie-maker on how we could get rid of those spiders. If we get rid of those giant talking spiders, than we will get rewarded. Right?"

"I guess," Kagami was still wasn't sure about this.

Everyone else thought this was the dumbest thing. Hopefully Hashirama won't blame them all for Hiruzen's flawed logic.

72) There are no missions on destroying a monster spider

"What do you mean there is no mission to destroy a monster spider," Hiruzen whined again.

His team was quite embarrassed by his antics. Even Hashirama felt sorry for them. Of course this wasn't the first time he had felt this way towards them. It was worse for Hashirama since he has no idea what Hiruzen is talking about. He really should pay attention more to Hiruzen strange ideas.

"For the last time I don't think that there are any giant spiders you can kill."

This went on for a few more hours before Hiruzen finally gave up. This was very new for Hiruzen since he is the very definition of tenacity. Hopefully there won't be another person that kick Hiruzen from his throne but would be ten times worse.

~Several years later~

"Teach me, teach me, teach me," Naruto hounded Jiraiya for days on end.

It seemed that Naruto had enough tenacity to supply half of Konoha for ten days.

73) For the last time the milkshakes don't bring the guys to the yard. Whatever that means.

It was all Hiruzen's doing. Nobody knew how it started but it ended up that milkshakes brings the guys to the yard. Tobirama was getting peeved toward his student. At times he wished that Hiruzen could settle down for once and focus. But deep down he understood that isn't going to happen, ever.

"What's going on?" Hashirama asked.

"I am informing my fellow teammates on why the milkshakes bring the guys to yard."

Hashirama looked at his younger brother. The look told him everything. He didn't even know what the heck is going on either. Now Hashirama knew that this is going to be a very long day.

74) There is no such thing as insane troll logic.

"There is no such thing as insane troll logic," Hashirama told his brother. "It sounds too ridiculous to be real."

"Wait and see."

Tobirama's students ran up to the Senju brothers. Hiruzen seemed to be livid and the other two seemed not too much.

"Sensei," Koharu said. "Please tell Hiruzen that he's wrong…again."

"I'm not wrong Koharu. I thought of it last night."

"Well what is it?" Hashirama really wanted to know.

"You'll regret it brother," Tobirama warned him.

Hiruzen took a deep breath before saying anything. That let Tobirama knew that this idea was going to be a big one. His other two students knew it already and their looks told it.

"You see, in order to get strong I must be beaten to near death. Ergo I must fight Madara!"

Hashirama had 'you must be joking' look about him. Did Hiruzen really think that? He looked over at his brother to get some answers. His face explained it. This was perfectly normal for Hiruzen and that's what scared Hashirama so much.

74a) Madara isn't a master in it nor did he create it.

"Sensei," Hiruzen thoughtfully said. "How could I beat Madara if he is the master of insane troll logic? But he did create it. If he uses it than he could cast a giant eye on the moon to make us think two plus two equals banana and banana are really evil snake. But the snakes hate Madara more than they hate us. And the only thing that could save us from him is Tobi the cat."

Tobirama just closed his eyes and cross his arms. He really didn't want to answer that. It was a load of crap and it wouldn't be wise to dive in.

"Hiruzen," Hashirama said. "I don't think that would happen."

75) No you cannot make Madara believe that he went blind*

It was in the early morning hours. Team Tobirama had gotten up and was on a "mission." They sneaked into the Uchiha compound to do something important. It took nerves of steel to do this. They hope that it won't go wrong since they don't want to die. Yet.

Finding the right room, they sneaked in without much stirring from their target. After the job was done, they jolted out of there quicker than anything. They won't know if it worked or not.

~Several hours later~

"What in my name happened?" Madara hollered. "I'm blind, how could this happen? I demanded to know now!"

Anger didn't even cover how he felt. He would figure out how he became blind one way or another. Of course after much cool down he figured it out on his own. The reason really took the biscuit.

"Hashirama!"

~Thirty minutes later~

Hashirama didn't know what to say to the trio. For one they did something extremely stupid that could get them killed. On the other hand they did something that was nearly impossible to do. Even for him to do that same thing would in no doubt fail. It was impressive to say at least and wanted to award them but couldn't. Madara was seething with anger. On the other side of the room Tobirama was trying not to laugh his ass off.

"I don't want to know but for the safety and honor of Konoha don't do it again. Understand?"

"Understood," they said. They knew how to play this game.

A/N: *idea from Pyre the Pyro from ff.net